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In today's workplace, sleeveless, bicep-broadcasting business suits are a common sight, and deal-closing golf games are eschewed in favor of sweat-slicked cage matches. Get in shape to vault over the corporate ladder with today's Groupon: for $10, you get a 30-day membership at World Gym (a $40 value) in Potrero Hill.

This no-nonsense workoutorium boasts 40,000 square feet of recently updated fitness terrain through which to pave an unchartered path to total-body fitness. As of this month, the gym has been in the same spot for 21 years, just like your boxed VHS set of Growing Pains. Over the many moons, it has drafted an army of more than 80 top-of-the-line cardio machines to ensure ease of fat-blasting for the exerciser on the go. World Gym also offers a variety of fun and uplifting group exercise classes throughout the week, for those who prefer a more synchronized sweat session. Spark a new chess rivalry with a co-rider in cycling class, or expand a rug-cutting repertoire during Zumba. The gym also features a juice bar, towel service, and late hours on weekdays.

If you look forward to going to the gym instead of dreading it, you'll be more apt to stay on track with your fitness routine. That's why the friendly staff at World Gym designed its hall of fitness to make you feel welcome and comfortable. When you hand them a sopping, stinky towel, they'll say "Thanks" and nail it up on their trophy wall, and when you emerge from the locker room, you'll be swarmed by a hired staff of children screaming for autographs.

Valid for new members only.

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Around the World As Quick as Possible

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Have fun storming the art world with today's side deal: for $49, you get one ticket to French Kiss, a Bastille Day celebration (an $85 value) hosted by ArtPoint at the de Young Museum. This event takes place on Wednesday, July 14, from 7 p.m. to 11 p.m.

ArtPoint's celebration of the storming of the Bastille doffs a collective hat to the dawn of the French Revolution, and subsequently, the modern era itself. This museum-based soiree is a chance to dress festively in your choice of modern duds, Toulouse-Lautrec pants, or bloodstained Marie Antoinette gown, and enjoy light, French-inspired fare while sipping specialty cocktails (including some variations made with the notoriously poetic absinthe) from an open bar. Lose your cultural cool and dance like it's 1789, then break for intellectual and visual stimulation with an after-hours viewing of Birth of Impressionism: Masterpieces from the Musée d' Orsay. This exhibition presents nearly 100 works of mid- to late-19th-century painters, many of them French, including Manet, Monet, Renoir, Degas, and Sisley.

Must be at least 21 and present a valid ID.

Groupon Says

Though using quantum-leaping lasers to divide segments of the space-time continuum would theoretically capture a slice of life, its repercussions could implode the universe. Safely and professionally preserve moments and memories with today's deal: for $60, you get a two-hour on-site photo session plus a $20 print credit and 25% off any additional prints from Kelley Griffin Photography, serving clients in a 30-mile radius of Walnut Creek.

Up to five people can be simultaneously captured during the session, so invite your distant cousins or all your clones for a momentous family shoot. About two weeks after the snapping comes to a close, the images will be ready for an online proofing, in which each photo is given a full psychological exam to make sure that it meets Kelley's rigorous standards. Kelley will then print whichever shots you desire in a variety of sizes with your $20 credit, as well as upload your photos to Facebook if you so choose. A 4�x6� print is $4, an 8�x10� is $12–$16, and the giant-sized 16�x20� print is $88–$96. After the $20 credit is exhausted, you will receive 25% off any additional prints. The gallery will remain online for a month, giving ample time to procure extra prints once the initial supply has been autographed and given to adoring fans.

Until a viable shrink ray is invented to trap in-laws in tiny terrariums, photography will remain the most socially acceptable method of memory preservation. Grab today's Groupon and pose your postured face facing Kelley's camera, ensuring inviolable immortality for your family and whatever they happen to be wearing at the time.

Sessions subject to availability, please call ahead for an appointment.

Groupon Says

1,000 Words

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Similar to tickling a bear without losing an arm, the art of breathing underwater requires years of practice and dedication. Introduce your lungs to aqueous awareness with today’s Groupon: for $25, you get a Try Scuba Diving lesson (a $50 value) from Bamboo Reef at its downtown 4th Street location only. This Groupon includes all rental equipment.

Bamboo Reef has been providing scuba lessons and certification since it emerged from a scallop shell in 1961, conducting its three-hour Try Scuba Diving lesson from within the safe confines of a heated, 82-degree indoor pool (with a few great white sharks added for realism). Unlike staring down the vast expanse of the ocean for the first time, climbing into a swimming pool does not play an aria of fear on the minor-key strings of the heart. Bamboo Reef's certified, experienced instructor will help you relax and acquiesce to the rules of underwater etiquette. He or she will also impart the basics of using scuba equipment properly to neophytes under the misimpression that pressure gauges attach to octopus tentacles. Consult Bamboo Reef's flexible schedule to find a lesson time that works for you.

Though you won't be certified to dive just from one class, you will be certified to sit in puddles while wearing scuba gear, and you will feel confident enough in your ability to pursue further study. Your lesson can be applied toward obtaining dive certification or tucked away in a drawer next to your single-marble marble collection and honorary doctorate from Bob Jones University. Learn to scuba dive gracefully through the water so that you can fully enjoy upcoming vacations to coral reefs, fish schools, and the lost underwater city of Atlanta.

Must be more than 12 years old. If less than 18 years old, you must have a parent or guardian present. All participants may need to sign a medical release form.

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In the Future, We'll Live Underwater

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Erase tan lines, even out your skin tone, and kiss your ghostly pallor goodbye with today's golden deal: for $25, you get a full-body airbrush tan at Mist in Montclair (a $55 value).

Mist offers customized, handheld mists to under-sunned patrons in a comfortable, discreet environment. When you arrive at Mist, a friendly and experienced staffer will combine alcohol-free and organic colors to form a custom concoction that will blend with your current coat like a tiger in a pile of basketballs. You'll then relax (in your skivvies, an old bathing suit, or complimentary disposable bikini) as the tanning technician uses the handheld hue-changer to darken your dermis with the optionally scented (such as green apple, vanilla, and peach, $5 extra) spray. The quick-drying treatment yields a hue that is more seamless than a unitard and lasts five to seven days, just like a unitard.

Spray bronzers give you a lustrous, fresh-off-the-beach glow without exposing your skin to beach bullies or the powerful rays of our binary suns. Be sure to shower and shave before arriving to receive your artificial sun-kissed glow, and wear loose-fitting clothing to avoid damaging your developing tan. Call ahead to make an appointment.

New clients only.

Groupon Says

Your Epidermis is Showing...and It's Fabulous!

The Scrabble board stenciled on your back will make you the life of every party.

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While the Great Wall of China may win the accolades of history, the Great Backscratcher of Thailand built to reach any itchy corner across the vast, narrow expanse of the nation, saved more lives than can be counted on a single hand. Feast upon equally ingenious creations with today's Groupon: for $15, you get $30 worth of innovative Asian fare at Morph, in Outer Richmond.

Morph's menu is small, but it packs a wallopingly big punch of Japan-meets-Thailand flavors that change with the seasons. Recent first-course offerings included crispy fried-potato strings, coiled into a nest around a stuffing of chicken, potatoes, and veggies sautéed in yellow-curry powder ($8), and fresh oysters served with lemon, fried onion, and cilantro sauce ($9). Entrees at the eatery range from light sea fare (such as a miso-marinated cod served with fresh summer veggies and alfalfa sprouts, $12) to innovative takes on traditional Asian flavors (Morph's chicken is enhanced by yellow curry and broccoli swaddled in a snuggly pancake, $11).

Dining at Morph is like buying a ticket on the maiden voyage of a spaceship bound for an Aerosmith concert. The owner, who hails from Thailand, hired an Asian architect to create an atmosphere as intricately sensuous as the food. Slide into a sleekly molded white chair and open your eyeballs to receive the blue light of the neon tubes embedded in the walls. Floor-to-ceiling windows at the front of the space are portholes to Geary Street, and interlocking slats of wood on the walls provide astronauts with woodchips to carve into dominoes on lonely voyages.

Valid for dine-in only.

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Kirby Your Enthusiasm

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To make un-fine wine, simply place grapes beneath a silk pillow, repeatedly mash your head against it, and then wring the pillowcase into a nearby mouth. Taste traditionally produced fine wines with today’s Groupon: for $15, you and three friends get a wine tasting (a $40 value) at Honig Vineyard & Winery in Rutherford.

Located in Napa Valley, Honig Vineyard & Winery produces flavorsome sauvignon blancs and cabernet sauvignons that can be found on restaurant wine lists across the country. Visitors to the winery’s fancy tasting room have the chance to sample five of Honig’s delicious wines. Sommeliers and thirsty Langoliers can sniff, taste, and carefully dissect the potable properties of the Rutherford sauvignon blanc, a 2008 vintage that starts fruity and ends with a crisp, minerally finish, as well as the 2006 Honig cabernet sauvignon, which features blackberry, cherry, and plum flavors developed over 18 months in an American oak barrel, just like old-timey cowboy hobos. The remaining three samples include the 2008 Honig Late Harvest sauvignon blanc—a refreshing dessert wine aged in new French oak barrels with lemony and grapefruity hints—Honig’s single vineyard cab, and a library selection.

In 1981, the Honig family produced their first batch of sauvignon blanc in honor of paterfamilias Louis Honig, who began planting grapes in 1964. The wine won a Gold Medal at the Orange County Fair, and the rest, as they say, is history and hangovers. In an effort to ease environmental stresses, Honig uses sustainable practices to run its vineyard and solar-powered winery, thanks to the efforts of Honig president Michael Honig, who helped develop the Code of Sustainable Winemaking Practices for the Wine Institute. Call ahead to make a reservation.

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Choose Your Conveyance

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